Note: Deliberate self-harm is not necessarily inflicted with suicidal intent, and engaging in self-harm does not necessarily mean that someone wants to die.
Those who inflict harm on themselves may believe it “helps” them cope with their experiences and their emotions. For sexual assault victims, self injury may:1
- Provide a way to express difficult or hidden feelings.
- It’s common for victims to feel numb or empty as a result of sexual assault.
- Engaging in self-harm may provide a temporary sense of feeling again, as well as a way to express anger, sadness, grief or emotional pain.
- Provide a way of communicating to others that support is needed.
- Provide a distraction from emotional pain.
- Provide self-punishment for what they believe they deserve.
- Provide proof that they are not invisible.
- Provide a feeling of control: It’s not uncommon to feel that self-harm is the only way to have a sense of control over life, feelings, body, especially if other things in life are out of control.
Some common methods of self-harm include:1
- Cutting
- Burning
- Biting
- Hitting the body
- Pulling out hair
- Scratching and picking at sores on skin
- Eating Disorders
- Substance Abuse
- It may be helpful for the survivor to have the help and support of a loved one while finding a counselor.
- If the survivor feels that talking with someone is too overwhelming, you can urge him or her to write down the problem.
- Recognize the choices you have NOW; ask yourself what YOU need.
- Choose to put off self-harm for specific amounts of time until a professional can be contacted (e.g., 15 minute increments).
- Countdown to relaxation (10… 9… 8… 7…); start meditation exercises; pay attention to your breathing and the rhythmic motions of your body.
- Write in a diary or journal.
- Make a list of people you can call for support; connect with others (group, one-on-one).
- Plan something new and exciting to do with friends.
- Take up a craft (needlework, quilting, painting, etc.).
- Play video games, listen to the radio, watch television as a distraction.
If you or someone you know is contemplating self-harm, call the National Sexual Assault Hotline at 1-800-656-HOPE or visit the Online Hotline at online.rainn.org.
If you or someone you know is contemplating suicide, call 911 immediately. If there’s no one in your life that you feel comfortable talking to about your suicidal thoughts, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at (800) 273-TALK.
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